Mary, your dogs might not be around when you get home. I'm not saying i'm going to do anything, (like kill them) but now you have some time to prepare yourself.
Now, just so everyone knows whats going on, i am housesitting for mary, while she is DC visiting her aunts. I have already screwed up and forgot to take out the trash and recycling, and i haven't watered yet cause of the moving (but i am doing the watering tonight), and i forgot to bring in the paper this morning, but other than that i am doing a pretty good job. Except there is just one small thing and one big thing keeping this from being a pleasant week. Those two things are Molly and Spike, Mary's two dogs. I like to refer to them as twittle dee and twittle dumb, or sometimes my brothers naming convention of dumb shit and dumb f$%! (or better yet numb nuts and ass wipe) but i have only had to resort to those names just recently, the last name for them is pinky and the brain. Molly is a small Jack Russell Terrier, which supposedly means she is intelligent (as far as i can see she still licks her ass and wipes it on the carpet, eats her own shit, and pees in the hallway, so i don't know if i fully believe there is any "intelligence" there, actually they both do this) Spike on the other hand is a big pit bull / lab / something else ( i really don't remember, the important part is that he is about 4X the size of molly, and dumb as a log) and as mary keeps insisting, "he is only a puppy."
Spike is fun to watch, he can't catch the frizzbee, it just hits him in the face or he hits out of the air with his paw, he loves having things in his mouth (this includes everything, especially molly's head) especially when he doesn't know it is in his mouth, and then he drops it, or kicks it, and then it is like he just discovered it all over again, this repeats all the way around the yard for quite some time, or he carries big 6 foot long sticks in his mouth and can't figure out why he doesn't fit between a 4 foot opening, or he isn't very good at coming down stairs and he kind of tumbles a good part of the way down, and he hasn't figured out that a closed door doesn't open if you run into it at full speed. Spike is really playful, he loves tipping over the garbage can, and loves chewing up everything, the hammock courtney got in peru, the porch table, the chairs inside, the folding chairs outside, the couch, anything left on top of the dryer including dryer sheets, clothes, pretty much read this as anything and everything. Like i said, dumb as a log.
Molly on the other hand is like a cat. She can't be bought off with food, if you don't open the door quick enough she pretty much says f you and walks off, she will show you who needs who. Molly wants to be like cat (they get to go where they want, when they want) that her best trick is tunnelling out under the fence. She normally does it when you don't open the door quick enough for you or right when you get home i think, just to show you that she can, and because she wants you to chase her. Molly never eats when you put the food down for her, just because she knows that i am going to wait for her to finish before i put her out when i leave. Don't get me wrong, Molly is a wonderful dog when she is by herself, because she is like a cat, and Spike is pretty fun to, but since they are so different they are horrible together, because spike needs to stay outside, and molly inside, but they want to pick on each other so much that they just wine at the door when they aren't around each other. They are both instigators. The thing is Molly thinks she is a big dog, she tries to act like it, maybe because she is older or in the house first, but she hasn't realized that know she is never going to win tug of war with spike.
Posted by cmorton at July 11, 2003 02:08 PM | TrackBack